Over thinking & over caring has been 2 major factors in my personality. It’s not been doing me any favours, so lately I’ve been on a mission to be more carefree and live in the moment more.
I’ve been feeling lighter, laughing louder and life’s becoming easier….here’s what’s helped me.
1. Is it going to matter in a week, or a month?- Ask yourself, is what you’re facing or going through going to still matter in a week or a month, or a year? Probably not. Like always, time is a healer and in time problems disappear & often resolve themselves – so there’s no need to sit stressing about things that will soon have no place or part in your life.
2. What you can’t change, don’t try too – Learning what you can and cannot change is crucial. Unfortunately we do not have the power to change people or certain situations that may arise, but what we can control is our reaction to it. So what you can’t change, don’t even sweat over. Instead focus on yourself and the changes you CAN make to make yourself happier and your life more enjoyable.
3. Watch what you focus on – Honestly, it’s so simple. We decide what we focus on, what we entertain, what we give our attention and energy too. So if you don’t like something, don’t entertain it. Block it out and ignore it. Focus on things that make you happy, that make you smile, that make you feel good. The more you feed negative or shit situations, the more they play apart in your life and the more they make you feel like shit. So take self-responsibility, if you don’t like it, don’t acknowledge it.
4. Do more of the things you love – Maybe it’s a run, or a walk in the forest, or doing your makeup, or even just sitting watching hours of series on TV. It doesn’t matter what it is, but whatever you enjoy and love – DO MORE OF IT.
5. Put down your phone – I get it, we live in a time where social media is like centre stage. We’re addicted to scrolling through SM apps on our phones hours on end – but honestly it can be really damaging and things can subconsciously start affecting us. Learn to disconnect. Switch off. Forget the outside world and just do you.
6. Have boundaries and stick to them – Having boundaries is SO important, it’s how you set the tone of how you expect to be treated. But if you have them, you need to stick to them. And if someone over steps your boundaries, show them you will not accept it or tolerate it. In doing so you will be treated only how you wish to be and it also makes you feel empowered and strong.
7. Learn to say NO – Don’t be a people pleaser. Learn to say NO without feeling guilty. If something isn’t for you, that’s OK. If you don’t feel like doing something, that’s OK. You’ve got to be OK with saying NO and confident in doing so. This is your life, you need to live it pleasing yourself first, not others.
8. Trust the process of your life – Everything we face and go through is all part of the process – situations and events that unfold whether good or bad are all part of the process to guide us to the next phase of our lives. Everything in the end always makes sense. Nothing goes unaccounted for. So trust whatever is happening and/or happens is actually a good thing in the long run.
9. PMA – Law of attraction – it really fucking works. What we think, we attract. What we feel, we become. What we visualise, we can have. So the more you are feeling/thinking negative, that’s what you are going to get. It’s hard at first, but the more you keep a positive mind and positive feelings the more you will attract good things to your life!
10. Realise you hold the power – We literally hold the power over our lives & yet we so easily forget it. If we don’t like something we have the power to change it. If you hate your job, you have the power to leave & find a new one. In a toxic relationship? You have the power to end it. Don’t like how your spending your days? You can do something different. You can change absolutely anything you do not like, your mind will give you all the excuses in the book but remember they are just excuses formed by fear. Don’t let fear hold the power, hold the power yourself.
11. Busy your mind – Over thinking is the worst habit many of us have, however when you busy and preoccupy your mind, you have very little time for your mind to be able to wonder freely. So start busying yourself with things you love to do.
12. Live in the present moment – Tomorrow is actually NEVER guaranteed, the thing you’re worrying about may never happen. Things change really quickly. So stop worrying about tomorrow, or the day after that. Live in the present moment in front of you. Take each day and each moment as it comes.
13. Don’t take everything personal – When shit happens or someone treats us badly, we automatically (and understandably) take it personal. Realise it very rarely is personal. How someone acts and behaves is a reflection upon themselves and their own shit, not upon you.
14. Love yourself more – The more you love yourself and are completely secure with who you are the less you will give a shit. You won’t question, am I good enough? Because you will already know and believe that you are. You won’t compare yourself because you know there isn’t another you. When you are confident within yourself, and happy with who you really are – no one will be able to break you!
15. Listen to your gut – Your gut, your instincts and your intuition will NEVER steer you wrong! Think about it, how many times have you sat there and said – “I knew this was going to happen” or – “I wish I listened to my gut” – by following your instincts more, you will always make the right choices and decisions. It’s there for a reason, use it!
16. Look for the good – There really is good in everything, even through bad times – it leads us to something good. Again, it’s all about the process to where we are heading next. Without the bad, we wouldn’t appreciate the good after-all.
17. Opinions don’t matter – You could be the nicest, most giving person in the world and someone will still have something bad to say about you. Opinions are always going to exist and not everyone’s going to like you, or agree with your choices/decisions. The only person you’ve got to make happy is yourself, so if what you are doing is making you happy then who the fuck cares. ‘I’d rather be hated for who I am then loved for who I’m not‘
18. The truth always comes out – Sometimes we can find ourselves wondering, questioning or worrying about things…find peace in the fact that the truth always comes out in the end. You don’t need to go looking or searching for it – it will always find its way to you.
19. Surround yourself with people who make you feel good – Surround yourself with people who uplift you, motivate you, and make you feel loved. The ones who bring out the best in you. Life’s too short to be around anyone who makes you feel like shit. We are often products of our environment, so make sure your environment and the people who fill it are the best for you.
20. Focus on the journey, not the destination – We can become so fixated on the destination that we can end up missing opportunities & actually not fully enjoy or appreciate the journey. Don’t become so obsessed with the destination that you forget whats going to get you there. Enjoy every moment, every minute, every day. Life is about the journey, not the destination.